It's ecstatic up north

Yeah, America invented House music, but Britain gave that shit wings and made it fly. Here's inarguable proof via a 55 second live clip filmed at Liverpool's infamous Quadrant Park club circa 1991. What Liverpool lacked in having its own equivalent of 808 State or A Guy Called Gerald, the city made up for by knowing how to party. Someone in the YouTube comments reckons that this clip is "quite simply the best clubbing video on the entire internet!" Me, I'd crank the hyperbole-o-meter up even further: in the 4.5 billion years Earth has existed there has never been a better example of man & music in absolute euphoric synergy than when that beat drops at the 24 seconds mark.


Every 90s British Rave club had one freakishly tall shirtless bloke who was a dead-ringer for Zlatan Ibrahimovic.

Generic list post: April 2024

Obligatory wrap-up post of those songs I've played most during the month when I came across a Sid The Sexist ceramic ornament. Sidney meditates in a room with 1000 candles lit listening to some B.I.G shit. Speaking of Bad Boy Records rappers, celebrate G. Dep's release from prison with my G. Deep Cuts playlist.

G. Dep - Dollar Bill (1998)
Binary Star - Masters Of The Universe (2000)
YG - Knocka (2024)
Brotha Hung Lynch - Da Siccness (2024)
Tommy Richman - Million Dollar Baby (2024)
Pete & Bas - Mr Worldwide (2023)
Nine & Dex - Pecan Pie (2024)
Flo & Eddie - Keep It Warm (1976)
Vincent Gallo - Her Smell Theme (1985)
Alfonso de Vilallonga - Dog & Tin At The Beach (2024)

Bonus bloggin: 1nce again I'm gonna use my monthly wrap-up post to keep track of the best movies and TV shows I've been watching. * indicates rewatches dunnit.

Movies I watched and liked:
The Lavender Hill Mob (1951)
Patterns (1956)
Do The Right Thing (1989)*
X (2022)
Robot Dreams (2024)*
Late Night With The Devil (2024)*
You'll Never Find Me (2024)

TV shows I watched and liked:
Prisoner: Cell Block H (episodes 68 to 89) (1980)
Neighbours (new episodes) (2024)
Men Up (2024)
Mammals (episodes 1 to 5) (2024)
Match Of The Day 1 and 2 (new episodes) (2024)

Revenge Of The Jerk

YG - Knocka
(From Knocka single; 2024)


First time I've checked a new YG single since Swag in 2020 and he's only gone and dropped some fresh extratellestrial il grande Jerk redux shit which is right up my Grove Street. Initially thought that synth stab thingy is the It's Like That synth stab thingy, but now I think it's Raised Like This synth stab thingy. Whether It's Like That or Raised Like This, this is still a new YG single I can jam alongside a classic Ezale single. Two thumbs up like Run & D.M.C's heads.

OJ was a hero/villain to most, but he was always just Detective Nordberg to me

"Car trunk fulla cocaine
And that pistol in my lap go bang
I can never lack, no way
F*ck the police, I'm OJ"

Mic Terror - OJ Simpson
(From No Lives Matter album; 2021)


I was slightly disappointed that Mic Terror didn't capitalise on OJ Simpson's death by belatedly shooting a video for the best song from his No Lives Matter album. It's always said that the L.A police's pursuit of OJ Simpson was the most leisurely car chase of all time, so it makes sense that Mic T's ode to The Juice™ would be some prime "drive slow, homie" music. Big fan of the casual contempt for Fivio Foreign on this shit. That lad was part of my favourite New York Drill song to date, but he's a vacuous empty vessel, and N.Y Drill is novelty Rap even if it does offer up a few choonz every now and then.

My Mind Spray 14.5

Top 5 Rap interview lie of all time: Cage claiming he accidentally bit a prostitute's clitoris off via HHC magazine in the late 90s. All the more impressive given that late 90s Cage looked the sorta fella who thought a clitoris was some bloke who played for the Brazilian football team at the 1994 World Cup (hold ya head, Roberto Baggio.)

I hate when someone on eBay is selling a CD I want but they've taken a photo of the disc data side down on their mucky arse carpet. Who raised these melon-farming savages? I'd rather pay more and buy the CD from another seller than risk the CD turning up covered in dust and cat hair.

Let's piss off the purists: as far as 2024 old man-Rap goes, Brotha Lynch Hung's new single is vastly superior to Nas & DJ Premier's new single. Hung's single is a sleek evolution of his vintage sound, while the Nas & Primo song is so stodgy it's audio high cholesterol.

Rap beefs nowadays are just #content for Joe Budden, DJ Vlad, Akademiks, Adam22 and other such terrible gossip-mongering nonces to yap about. Still, if it stops Budden from actually releasing his Godawful music then long may his shitty podcast continue to flourish. How was it even possible to ruin the Pump It Up beat? Let some zombie-voiced wifebeater rhyme ONNNNNNN it, that's how.

Late pass!

G. Dep - Dollar Bill
(From DJ Ashknuckles' The Underground Railroad Part 1 mixtape; 1998)


Discovered via Instagram, a kinda proto-wavy pre-Bad Boy G. Dep deep cut. Apparently Black Rob was a big fan of this track and it lead to their link-up. One of those boutique reissue labels needs to drop a CD EP of all Dep's pre-Bad Boy jams; alas boutique reissue labels with good taste don't grow on trees like palm leaves. So, for now, you can catch this song where it currently makes the most sense - in my G. Dep deep cuts playlist, natch.

One very much 4 the Britz: grandads, we love you

Nine & Dex - Pecan Pie
(From Pecan Pie single; 2024)


Oh ok, so these are the two lads who ghostwrite and produce for the Road-Rap pensioners Pete & Bas (apparently they're their grandads.) Since the faces been revealed, game got real indeed: mans go back-and-forth like Neville & Carragher. Much like Giggs' Monsta Man, this is that old robotic futuristic Jet Set Willy crazy shit. 90% of British Rap is only good when it embraces the fact that it is, essentially, novelty music. LD and Youngs Teflon could never!

Pete & Bas - Mr Worldwide
(From Mr Worldwide single; 2023)

Generic list post: New York's alright...

Party Sparty whipped up a list of his favourite songs recorded for movies set in Noo Yawk. Great topic, lemme rock it: 20 Martorialist faves from N.Y.C movies/movie soundtracks which aren't on the Spartorialist's list. Very annoying that so many of the best soundtrack-exclusive Rap songs of the 90s were for movies based in California, but I guess that's the universe course-correcting New York bias or sumfink.

Krzysztof Komeda - Dream (1968)
Edwin Starr - Easin' In (1973)
Badder Than Evil - Hot Wheels (The Chase) (1973)
Curtis Mayfield - Do Do Wap Is Strong In Here (1977)
Keith Emerson - The Chase (1981)
John Lurie - The Lamposts Are Mine (1984)
Melle Mel & The Furious Five - Beat Street Breakdown (1984)
Arthur Baker - Breaker's Revenge (1984)
Madonna - Into The Groove (1985)
Beastie Boys - Desperado (1988)
Grand Puba - Fat Rat (1991)
Biggie Smalls - Party & Bullshit (1993)
Crooklyn Dodgers '95 - Return Of The Crooklyn Dodgers (1995)
Mobb Deep ft. Big Noyd & Rakim - Hoodlum (1997)
Vincent Gallo - Lonely Boy (1998)
Clint Mansell - Summer Overture (2000)
Harry Gregson-Williams - First Call (2002)
50 Cent ft. Young Buck - I'll Whip Ya Head Boy (2005)
Tony Yayo - Fake Love (2005)
Julian DeMarre & Heiko Male - Moe At Work (2019)

Related: if you've ever wanted a wordless animated bromance between a dog & a robot set in 1980s New York which features a breakdancing scene set to T La Rock's Breakdown then Robot Dreams is the movie 4 u. Best bittersweet buddy comedy flick since Brian & Charles, and the freedom of animation means they've been able to recreate 80s New York in a way no live action movie ever could. My fave movie of 2024 so far.

Born To Audiomack: G. Dep deep cuts

G. Dep - G. Deep Cuts
1. How (1995)
2. Blak N*gga (1996)
3. Automatic (1996)
4. Head Over Wheels (1996)
5. Blow More Spots (1996)
6. Dollar Bill (1998)
7. Everyday remix (ft. Faith Evans) (2001)
8. Gametime (2009)


Throw ya hands in the freakin' air and keep 'em there, G. Dep just got outta the box that's square. Celebrate the Deputy's release from prison with this playlist of G. Deep Cuts where he makes the gutter sound butta. Truthfully, this used to be my best of G. Dep playlist from 2015, but all the songs from his Bad Boy Records album have long since been DMCA-ed into oblivion and these seven songs are what's left. Regardless, this is still a playlist so hot it'll make you scream like you struck gold, that's cold.

**EDIT** added Dollar Bill which I've just discovered.

Generic list post: March 2024

Obligatory wrap-up post of those songs I've played most during the month when the "Madvillainy is #actually MF DOOM's masterpiece" brigade were out in full force again. I like Madvillainy, but never in a month of Black Sundays is it on a par with Operation Doomsday let alone better than it. Youse lot are some literal wrong 'uns.

Warren G - Dope Beat (1999)
Saigon - Favorite Thingz (extended) (2006)
Daya1k ft. Kiki Tha Prize - Good (2024)
Sexyy Red - Get It Sexyy (2024)
Level ft. Mouse On Tha Track - To Da Beat (2024)
AyooLii - Dumpin' Out A Zip (2024)
Rogue Unit - Good To U (Rogue Unit mix) (1995)

Bonus beats: sung the praises of T.C.K by Y@k Ballz and included it in this little playlist of legit jams by tragically unhip New York rappers. Put together a top 5 Level & Mouse On Tha Track singles playlist too.

Bonus bloggin': I'm gonna blatantly bite take a page outta Party Sparty's blog and use these monthly wrap-up posts to keep track of the best movies and TV shows I've been watching.

Movies I watched and liked:
Sherlock Holmes: Terror By Night (1933)
Offerings (1989)
Late Night With The Devil (2024)
Immaculate (2024)
Robot Dreams (2024)

TV shows I watched and liked:
Prisoner: Cell Block H (episodes 45 to 68) (1980)
Neighbours (new episodes) (2024)
Wanted (series 3) (2018)
Mandy (series 3) (2024)
How To With John Wilson (series 3) (2023)
Match Of The Day 1 and 2 (new episodes) (2024)

The worst TV show I saw this month (and possibly all year) was Michael Owen & Howard Webb's Sky Sports show, which was on in the pub a couple of weeks back when there was no football on TV that night. The two most charmless men in sports broadcasting, a field which also contains such titanic c**ts as Garth Crooks, Glenn Hoddle and Mark Goldbridge. Never have I more wanted Vladimir Putin to launch a drone attack on a TV studio.

Born To Audiomack: The Tragically Unhip

Tragically Unhip New Yorkers
1. Homeboy Sandman ft. J-Live & Kurious - Enough (2014)
2. Maino - Rumors (2005)
3. Blaq Poet - Bang Dis! (2005)
4. Y@k Ballz - T.C.K (2001)
5. Necro - Rugged Shit (1999)
6. Consequence - Alphabet Boys (2010)
7. Uncle Murda - Anybody Can Get It (2008)
8. Sen City - Cloud Surfin' (2014)


Continuing my one man quest to get Y@k Ballz's T.C.K and Maino's Rumors recognised & realised as 5 Star General classics, here's a playlist of eight legit choonz by New York rappers who are deemed tragically unhip. You ain't gonna score no cool points with any of these songs, but I swear you'll have more fun listening to this playlist than you'll have listening to the latest factory-farmed Alchemist EP with one of Earl Sweatshirt's trendy m8s ;)